It's been almost 10 months since I last wrote a blog post. I really am not even sure where to start....
I wish I had kept better blog posts this year, but I was so hesitant because most days it just didn't seem true. It's hard sometimes to write all of my feelings in one spot and go back and read them months or years later. But this past month, I decided it was time to record this amazing time.
In March, this year, I was finishing up my EMR class and one evening I was having quite a bit of lower abdominal pain. One of the teachers, and our friend, was concerned and brought me heating pads and made me promise to go to the doctor in the morning. I promised, but was hesitant because I figured it had to do with my PCOS. I knew I had a cyst on my ovary and was scared there was probably more now and decisions would have to be made about medication. I had experienced several miscarriages over the past few years and I knew the medication would act as a fertility drug also. So Ronnie and I decided to go to the doctor together to try and make the best decision. I had finally come to a place of contentment of not having any more children and realizing they were all getting older now. I had prayed for years (8 years to be exact) for another baby after Leah, but finally decided to pray for peace instead.
The next morning, March 12, I called in and got an appointment for that morning. We walked in and Misty, the nurse took my vitals and listened to the symptoms of the pain and had me give a urine sample. She very quickly came back in and joyfully said, "Congratulations!! You're pregnant!" Ronnie and I just looked at each other in shock, which quickly turned to panic for me, because I knew there was no point in getting my hopes up. Not to mention, I figured with this pain, that meant something bad. The doctor (who is also our close friend) came in and congratulated us, but also tried to console me. I was immediately thinking ectopic since I was in so much pain. He ordered an ultrasound to ease my mind and we quickly came home to explain to the kids. We told them that I had positive pregnancy test and to pray all day while we waited to go to the hospital. During that time I had to have a talk with Lindsay, who was a little puzzled on how I could get pregnant after all this time. I pulled out one of "health/birds & bees" books and this was the last page. And all at once, I felt like God just spoke to me, saying, "I am in control and I have amazing plan for this baby boy!"
3 o'clock finally rolled around and we went to the hospital for the ultrasound, where we were quickly relieved to see a beautiful heartbeat and a tiny little baby placed perfectly inside my uterus where it belonged. The pain was sure enough coming from the cyst that was on my ovary, but the ultrasound tech assured us that cysts typically dissolve with pregnancy. She said she was very surprised I was able to get pregnant for all the follicles on my other ovary from the PCOS!
We spent the rest of the afternoon and evening letting the kids call and tell their grandparents and our friends. We knew it was early, but this was the first heartbeat we had seen since Leah and we knew we'd need the prayer! Not to mention, we knew this was a miracle!
The next day I called to make an appointment with the OB (who is also a good friend of ours). They got me in within 2 weeks and started prenatal care right away. Due to precautions (and my maternal age) he sent me to Indy to have some genetic testing done. This was one of the hardest things throughout the entire pregnancy. We had to go back to the same area where Hannah had lived her whole life in the hospital. Tears just streamed down my face when we turned on 86th Street and shivers ran down my spine when we passed her hospital. It had been 10 years since I walked out of that building carrying my lifeless child. Thankfully, the office we were going to was in another building and my parents were meeting us for support, so I gathered myself together and prayed the appointment went smoothly. They went through my medical history, mostly about Hannah, and took blood to run tests for things such as Downs Syndrome and Turner's. We also were given the option to find out the sex of the baby this early. (Even though, deep inside I already knew it was a boy.) We had ask our church prayer group to cover us in prayer for these tests, because I just didn't know if my heart could handle having another child in that hospital. Several days later after waiting on pins and needles, I finally called back to Indy to see if they had gotten the results. She opened them while on the phone with me. We put her on speaker phone so the girls could hear (Derek was at work)...….All clear on the genetic disorders....Praise the Lord! And then she ask, "Do you want to know the sex of the baby? What do you think it is?" "A boy!" I quickly answered. "Yes!, 99% chance that it is a boy!" She replied. We were all so excited!! So we ran in and dyed 2 eggs, one blue and one pink and took over to the farm for a little gender reveal for Derek. He was soooo excited!!! He just kept saying he had been praying for a brother for years!
All of my prenatal care went very smoothly. I had to make one more trip up to Indy for them to check my uterine wall since this would be my 5th C-section and there is more of a risk the more you have. The doctor up there quickly cleared me to deliver down here and said there wasn't any need for me to come back to Indy unless something changed. Praise the Lord!!
I did develop gestational diabetes during the 3rd trimester, which has not been fun, but it hasn't killed me either ;) I've done weekly NST these last 2 months, which have actually been nice to hear his precious heartbeat every week, here at the end.
Now, as I write this, my C-section is scheduled for this Wednesday. I am getting very nervous about the surgery. After all these years, I never in my wildest dreams thought we'd be doing this again. I've spent this whole pregnancy being in awe of how it all worked out! I've worried over this baby growing up by itself, but the kids are soooo excited for him to come, I know he will be beyond loved and included even as they each move on while he is still here at home.
What's his name, you ask? He will be named Daniel Lee Roach. We knew we wanted a "D" name to go along with Derek. Ronnie has always been very insistent that our kids' names mean something. Daniel is after our doctor that we are such close friends with and who has been such a inspiration in Ronnie's life and he and his wife have helped us in so many ways with our Christian walk and parenting. Lee is Ronnie's middle name that we will be passing on. Needless to say, we are all beyond excited to meet and finally hold and cuddle Mr. Daniel!!
~For this child I prayed; and the Lord hath given me my petition which I asked him.~
1 Samuel 1:27
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